The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}

Should we be talking about felt safety when so much is genuinely unsafe?I’ve been thinking a lot about this hard and honest question that so many parents are holding: when danger, injustice, and unmet needs are real and ongoing, does focusing on felt safety miss the point? Or can it actually be part of resistance, coherence, and long-term protection for our nervous systems?In this episode, you’ll learn:Why focusing on felt safety is not the same as ignoring real danger, injustice, or systemic failure- and how both truths can coexistHow strengthening the nervous system can reduce long-term harm without minimizing how hard, unfair, or traumatic things areWhy regulation and moments of safety, connection, and coherence are not toxic positivity- but a necessary foundation for advocacy, boundaries, and resilienceResources mentioned in this podcast:Creating Felt Safety LIVE webinar with Robyn on Thursday January 15th RobynGobbel.com/FeltSafetyWebinarThe Club! RobynGobbel.com/TheClubRead the full transcript at: https://robyngobbel.com/nothingfeelssafeWe're kicking off 2026 with a LIVE webinar- Creating Felt Safety! Attend live and watch the recording- PLUS get a huge folder of digital resources including a workbook all about how to impact YOUR felt safety!Register at -----> RobynGobbel.com/FeltSafetyWebinar I would love to have you join me this March in Durango, CO for a 3-day, retreat style workshop: Presence in Practice: An experiential workshop into the neurobiology of how change happens.All details and registration ------> https://RobynGobbel.com/DurangoRegister by January 31 for $25 off! :::Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/bookJoin us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClubSign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/ImmersionFollow Me On:FacebookInstagram Over on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

In part 3 of this series on Boundaries with Connection, Juliane Taylor Shore talks us through how boundaries work in relationships with our children - relationships where we have to show up every day - and why it is so important for us to have good psychological boundaries when our children are verbally aggressive. In this episode, you’ll learn:What are psychological boundariesHow do psychological boundaries help usWhy good psychological boundaries are important when a child is verbally aggressiveHow to create space between your mind and another's mindResources mentioned in this podcast:Juliane Taylor Shore's website: https://www.cleariskind.com/Juliane's boundaries course: ​​https://therapywisdom.com/neurobiology-of-feeling-safe/Jules' Relationship Podcast : https://whydoesmypartner.com/FREEOne-page PDF infographic on Boundaries with Connection!CLICK HERE to get the download sent to your inboxRead a summary or the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/boundaries3We're kicking off 2026 with a LIVE webinar- Creating Felt Safety! Attend live and watch the recording- PLUS get a huge folder of digital resources including a workbook all about how to impact YOUR felt safety!Register at -----> RobynGobbel.com/FeltSafetyWebinar I would love to have you join me this March in Durango, CO for a 3-day, retreat style workshop: Presence in Practice: An experiential workshop into the neurobiology of how change happens.All details and registration ------> https://RobynGobbel.com/DurangoRegister by January 31 for $25 off! Get access to over 25+ free resources in our brand, new Free Resource Hub! RobynGobbel.com/FreeResourceHub :::Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/bookJoin us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClubSign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/ImmersionFollow Me On:FacebookInstagram Over on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

In part 2 of this series on Boundaries with Connection, we explore how to set boundaries that create success by providing structure and containment that offers safety, connection, and co-regulation.In this episode, you’ll learn:How boundaries can create physical and emotional safetyHow to create the kind of boundaries your child really needs for continued developmentHow to set boundaries with the intent of increasing regulationResources mentioned in this podcast:Previous podcast episode https://robyngobbel.com/scaffoldingFREEOne-page PDF infographic on Boundaries with Connection!CLICK HERE to get the download sent to your inboxRead a summary or the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/boundaries2We're kicking off 2026 with a LIVE webinar- Creating Felt Safety! Attend live and watch the recording- PLUS get a huge folder of digital resources including a workbook all about how to impact YOUR felt safety!Register at -----> RobynGobbel.com/FeltSafetyWebinar I would love to have you join me this March in Durango, CO for a 3-day, retreat style workshop: Presence in Practice: An experiential workshop into the neurobiology of how change happens.All details and registration ------> https://RobynGobbel.com/DurangoRegister by January 31 for $25 off! Get access to over 25+ free resources in our brand, new Free Resource Hub! RobynGobbel.com/FreeResourceHub :::Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/bookJoin us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClubSign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/ImmersionFollow Me On:FacebookInstagram Over on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

Focusing on understanding what's driving behavior can sometimes make it feel like we aren't addressing the behavior at all. It can feel as if we are boundaryless and permissive. This episode sheds light on what boundaries really are and how focusing on regulation, connection and felt-safety increases compassionate boundaries in response to behaviors.In this episode, you’ll learn:What boundaries really areHow they are different than punishment and rulesExamples of boundariesWhat to do when your child violates a boundary Resources mentioned in this podcast:Previous podcast episode "But What about a Consequence?"FREEOne-page PDF infographic on Boundaries with Connection!CLICK HERE to get the download sent to your inboxRead a summary or the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/boundaries1We're kicking off 2026 with a LIVE webinar- Creating Felt Safety! Attend live and watch the recording- PLUS get a huge folder of digital resources including a workbook all about how to impact YOUR felt safety!Register at -----> RobynGobbel.com/FeltSafetyWebinar I would love to have you join me this March in Durango, CO for a 3-day, retreat style workshop: Presence in Practice: An experiential workshop into the neurobiology of how change happens.All details and registration ------> https://RobynGobbel.com/DurangoRegister by January 31 for $25 off! Get access to over 25+ free resources in our brand, new Free Resource Hub! RobynGobbel.com/FreeResourceHub :::Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/bookJoin us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClubSign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/ImmersionFollow Me On:FacebookInstagram Over on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

In this episode, I unravel how to extend connection to our children while acknowledging that some might see this connection as a threat. I offer insights on toning down the demand for connection, enabling our children to relax in it, and thereby strengthen their stress response system. I also reference the previous episodes in this four-part series by talking about the science of opposition, some practical strategies, and tackling kids stuck in protection mode, all with the aim of providing a comprehensive understanding of making connection a safe experience.In this episode you’ll learn:That providing too much connection can often be overwhelming and feel more like danger than connectionTo titrate connection and supply only as much as the child needs or wantsShowing your child you think of them when are not together like buying their favorite snack, titrates connection by showing that you are thinking of them and you see themResources mentioned in this podcast:Exploring Low Demand Parenting: Shifting Power Dynamics And Nurturing Trust {EP 142}Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/oppositional4We're kicking off 2026 with a LIVE webinar- Creating Felt Safety! Attend live and watch the recording- PLUS get a huge folder of digital resources including a workbook all about how to impact YOUR felt safety!Register at -----> RobynGobbel.com/FeltSafetyWebinar I would love to have you join me this March in Durango, CO for a 3-day, retreat style workshop: Presence in Practice: An experiential workshop into the neurobiology of how change happens.All details and registration ------> https://RobynGobbel.com/DurangoRegister by January 31 for $25 off! Get access to over 25+ free resources in our brand, new Free Resource Hub! RobynGobbel.com/FreeResourceHub :::Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/bookJoin us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClubSign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/ImmersionFollow Me On:FacebookInstagram Over on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)