The Imperfects
Hugh van Cuylenburg, Ryan Shelton & Josh van Cuylenburg

Neueste Episode
294 Episoden
- What is racism, really?
💌Join 9,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy
Adam Briggs, rapper, writer, actor, senator and Yorta-Yorta man, joins Hugh, Josh and guest host Nazeem Hussain, to have an honest conversation about racism in Australia.
We explore the impact of The Voice Referendum vote, how culture and community impacts identity, and why Briggs has never, ever felt the need to people please (yep, that’s the sound of us frantically scribbling down notes).
Briggs also chats about the highs and lows of bipolar II.
0:00 – No boundaries Briggs
5:26 –Big Shep’ Washing Machine
12:25 – This is racism
21:27 – A hyper-vigilante
28:06 – Perfect storm for art
36:09 – Copping it Australia Wide
43:22 – The Yes Vote
53:08 – Australian Culture
57:02 – Never just about music
1:04:50 – Make Aboriginal Cool
1:09:19 – Bipolar, therapy, training
🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode
Ben Shewry (Pt 1) - The Other Side of Excellence - https://bit.ly/4fErGpQ
Ben Shewry (Pt 2) - How The Chef Was Made - https://bit.ly/45sPsR7
Ben Shewry - Making It Right (And Delicious) - https://bit.ly/4gXyDEZ
Nazeem Hussain - Losing a Parent - https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-imperfects/id1476501557?i=1000589981824
🎧Things to listen to
Big Noter - https://www.thebignoter.com
The Children Came Back by Briggs & Gurrumul - https://bit.ly/4fGaxMH
📺Things to watch
Briggs’s Voice Referendum ad - https://bit.ly/4bkiTs2
📚Things to read
Our Home, Our Heartbeat by Adam Briggs - https://bit.ly/4yQKbjW
💻Things to check out
Rumbalara Football Netball Club - https://www.rfnc.com.au/
Bad Apples Music - https://bit.ly/4x8Rdi3
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcast http://apple.co/theimperfects
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. - Sex is sometimes a taboo topic. Not today! Intimacy expert Ita O’Brien tells us all about the new normal in the bedroom, and how she’s introduced it to Hollywood.
💌Join 9,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy
In 2017, Ita O’Brien changed how Hollywood approached sex scenes when she pioneered intimacy co-ordination on the hit Netflix show, Sex Education, by introducing the framework, “Intimacy On Set Guidelines”. She went on to on productions for Netflix, BBC, HBO, Hulu, Amazon, including Sex Education and Normal People, founding her own company Intimacy on Set.
And now she’s here.
Ita chats with the guys about what sex scenes were like before Intimacy Co-ordination, and all the lies movies taught us about sex. She explains the mysterious orgasm gap, why consent is the foundation of all intimacy, and maybe most importantly of all… the male and female anatomy of arousal! That bit’s at the 16min mark if you’re really in a hurry. 😉
00:00 – Meet Ita O'Brien, the World's First Intimacy Coordinator
01:32 – Inside Her Work on Normal People, I May Destroy You & Sex Education
04:17 – What Intimacy Actually Means (It's Not Just Sex)
07:34 – The Untold Story of the First-Ever Intimacy Coordinator Job
09:35 – What Sex Scenes Were Like Before Consent Guidelines Existed
12:27 – Why On-Screen Intimacy Shapes How We See Ourselves
14:33 – The Hidden Lie Movies Taught Us About Sex
16:00 – The Male Anatomy of Arousal, Explained
18:33 – The Female Anatomy of Arousal, Explained
23:17 – Why Desire Fades in Long-Term Relationships
25:59 – The Power of Touch (and Why We're Losing It)
30:39 – How Screens Are Rewiring Kids' Ability to Connect
34:08 – The Truth About the Orgasm Gap
40:30 – Why Consent Is the Foundation of All Intimacy
43:10 – Filming the Iconic Birth Scene in We Live in Time
49:52 – How to Talk to Kids About Consent and Bodies
52:24 – "Consent Is Sexy": A Call to Writers and Filmmakers
54:33 – Sex, Menopause and Intimacy at Every Life Stage
📖Things to read
Intimacy: A Field Guide to Finding Connection and Feeling Your Deep Desires by Ita O’Brien - https://www.penguin.com.au/books/intimacy-9781529954043
📺 Things to watch
Sex Education (Netflix) - https://www.netflix.com/title/80197526
Normal People (BBC/Hulu) - https://www.hulu.com/series/normal-people
I May Destroy You (BBC/HBO) - https://www.hbo.com/i-may-destroy-you
Catastrophe - https://www.amazon.com/Catastrophe-Season-1/dp/B00YGB8UYK
We Live in Time (Film4/A24) - https://www.a24films.com/films/we-live-in-time
🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode
Esther Perel — Let's Be Better Lovers - https://open.spotify.com/episode/1BantQso5Ef3xPn4PWNG2I
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcast http://apple.co/theimperfects
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. - Could you live without your phone for a month?
🩵To hear more episodes like this, join A Little More Imperfects!
Patreon - www.patreon.com/theimperfects
Apple - http://apple.co/theimperfects
This week it's just the three of us. And like Odysseus before us, we embark on a life changing epic.
Where he fought the trojans, monsters, cannibals, sirens, the oceans, a cyclops and ACTUAL GODS!!
We will do something even ‘EPIC…ER’.
We’re tackling our phones.
Each of us take on a month-long challenge to fix our worst phone habits, inspired by the ‘god of no phones’ - Christopher Nolan and the release of THE ODYSSEY (if that wasn’t obvious already, but we promise this episode isn't an ad).
We then share some of our favourite bits from behind the pay wall, from our Patreon/Subscriber community. Ryan has an unplanned, very generous on-air hair donation; Josh shares a bit from a book which changed his life a bit; which leads to one of the most honest conversations he and Hugh have ever had on (or off) the show, about comparison, self-esteem, and growing up idolising your older brother.
This is one epic journey.
00:00 — The Phone Odyssey Begins
08:54 — Our Phone-Free Pledges
19:11 — Modelling Better Habits at Home
25:29 — Hairing is Caring
37:57 — A Bit From a Book That Changed Josh’s Life a Bit
48:18 — The Conversation Between Brothers That Needed to Be Had
🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode
Bronte Campbell - Comparison, The thief of joy ****https://bit.ly/49S1S7C
Joe Brumm & Hamish Blake - A Bluey Print for Dads https://bit.ly/4w4ohI8
How (and why) Ryan Dumped his iPhone https://bit.ly/3T3xdyM
Sam Willoughby - The tragic injury that changed his life (and Ryan’s Finnastride admission) https://bit.ly/4fa5u8p
📖 Things to read
The midnight library - Matt Haigh https://bit.ly/4vGgnE0
How Proust can change your life - Alain de Botton https://bit.ly/4dYfCkd
In search of lost time - Marcel Proust https://bit.ly/4vt3lJG
📺Things to watch
The Odyssey https://bit.ly/4vY8nij
Christopher Nolan on 60minutes https://bit.ly/4yjfZgX
💌Join 8,300+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/shop/
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/shop/
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. - To be jealous is to be human. It is what you do with that feeling that counts.
💌Join 8,300+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy
Our resident psychologist Dr Emily Musgrove is in the studio to talk about THAT podcast moment: the one where Ryan admitted he was jealous of Hugh and Hamish Blake’s relationship. The one that lives in Imperfects history.
According to Dr Em, we develop the emotion of jealousy at just 9 months old, and it shows up everywhere; family, work, school, friends.
Feelings around jealousy can be extremely painful, especially if it is accompanied by shame.
In this episode, Dr Emily explores why jealousy can be so dangerous when not listened to, and why our jealous behaviour can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
See you on the other side.
If you want to watch this full video on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/dlufNQ7iXCc
00:00 - The Day Has Arrived
02:48 - When Ryan Revealed He Was Jealous of Hugh & Hamish
7:45 - Shame Tells You Not To Speak It
10:02 - Harry Styles Walks Into a Super Market
15:54 - You’re Making My Dog Jealous
22:31 - Feeling Jealous vs Being Jealous
43:49 - Hugh, Ryan & Hamish: 4 Years Later
47:50 - How To Have The Conversation (And Build Trust)
59:32 - You Can Feel Jealous AND Still Trust
🫖 Episodes mentioned in this episode
Hamish Blake - Let’s Talk About Self Doubt - https://bit.ly/3QG8MXo
💻Things to check out
Uncertainty vs inevitable pain study - https://bit.ly/43NWFKQ
🎵Songs to listen to
Jealous Guy by John Lennon - https://bit.ly/43NWzCY
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. - Want can you learn from playing with a child?
In today's Academy of Imperfection, Bluey creator Joe Brumm joins us (for real life), with Hamish Blake stepping in as guest host.
💌Join 8,300+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy
In this episode we dig into the world of play - ”the voluntary overcoming of unnecessary obstacles”, we find out what makes a ‘good’ player and why kids' imaginative play tends to fade around age 12.
Josh and Hugh take the chance to wax lyrical about their favourite Bluey episodes, Rain, Fruit Bat, Born Yesterday, The Decider (to name a few). And all three dads also share some moments of parenting shame as we discuss the constant battle for attention between our phones, and our kids.
00:00 - Hamish Blake from Rove
08:13 - Bluey, The Most Streamed TV Show of All Time
11:51 - The Best Definition of Play You've Ever Heard
21:00 - It’s All Improvising
38:02 - Permission to Pretend Again
51:20 - My Kids Wouldn’t Have The Dad They Have Without Bluey
54:00 - Doing Something Just for Fun Is a Valid Reason
58:07 - Being Present In a World of Distractions
01:22:00 - The Bluey Episode That Made a Room Full of Footballers Cry
01:27:16 - Let Them Lead and See What Happens
If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/eMigxjhCkcs
🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode
How (and why) Ryan dumped his iphone https://bit.ly/4vi83uA
📺 Things to watch
Bluey - Shadowlands https://bit.ly/4eTzKTA
Bluey - Calypso https://bit.ly/3QT6NyT
Bluey - Magic Xylophone https://bit.ly/4gdY057
Bluey - Born Yesterday https://bit.ly/3SvY5HA
Bluey - Bin Night https://bit.ly/4gd89Pt
Bluey - The decider https://bit.ly/4eHS1V4
Bluey - Faceytalk https://bit.ly/4wpWWju
Bluey - Pass the parcel https://bit.ly/4gi9PXU
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcast http://apple.co/theimperfects
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Weitere Bildung Podcasts
Trending Bildung Podcasts
Über The Imperfects
We’re all imperfect. On this podcast, founder of The Resilience Project Hugh van Cuylenburg, his good friend Ryan Shelton, and only one of their brothers, Josh van Cuylenburg, talks to a variety of interesting people who vulnerably share their own struggles and imperfections, or expertly pass on their wisdom on the subject of imperfection. Whether it’s in The Vulnerabilitea House, The Academy of Imperfection, or with our very own psychologist, Dr Emily, The Imperfects are here to find some valuable takeaways we can all apply to our own imperfect lives.
Podcast-WebsiteHöre The Imperfects, {ungeskriptet} - Der Meinungsfreiheit verpflichtet. und viele andere Podcasts aus aller Welt mit der radio.de-App

Hol dir die kostenlose radio.de App
- Sender und Podcasts favorisieren
- Streamen via Wifi oder Bluetooth
- Unterstützt Carplay & Android Auto
- viele weitere App Funktionen
Hol dir die kostenlose radio.de App
- Sender und Podcasts favorisieren
- Streamen via Wifi oder Bluetooth
- Unterstützt Carplay & Android Auto
- viele weitere App Funktionen


The Imperfects
Code scannen,
App laden,
loshören.
App laden,
loshören.




























